Learning more about the needs of care givers

Family members and friends are an important part of cancer care. Like patients, they have changing needs too. It’s common for many caregivers to become overwhelmed by the extra responsibilities placed upon them. Many find it hard to care for their loved one who is sick while trying to handle other obligations.

Caregiver needs

What “giving care” means

Giving care can mean helping with daily needs like going to doctor visits, making meals, and picking up medicines. It can also mean helping your loved one cope with feelings. Like when they feel sad or angry.

Sometimes having someone to talk to is what your loved one needs most. While giving care, it’s normal to put your own needs and feelings aside. But putting your needs aside for a long time is not good for your own health. You need to take care of yourself, too. If you don’t, you may not be able to keep caring for others.

Supportive care

Care givers require specific care too

It’s common to feel stressed and overwhelmed as a care giver. Like your loved one, you may feel angry, sad, or worried. Try to share your feelings with others who can help you. It can help to talk about how you feel. You could even talk to a counselor or social worker.

Here are some other things that may help you:

Learn about caregiver needs

Forgive yourself. Chances are that you’re doing what you can at this moment.
Cry or express your feelings. It’s okay to show that you are sad or upset.
Focus on things that are worth your time and energy. Let small things go for now.
Be hopeful. What you hope for may change over time. But you can always hope for comfort, joy, acceptance, and peace.

Understanding your feelings as a care giver

You probably experience many feelings as you take care of your loved one. There is no right way for you to feel. Each person is different. The first step to understanding your feelings is to know that they’re normal. Give yourself some time to think them through.

Understanding your feelings as a care giver

Sadness

It’s okay to feel sad. But if it lasts for more than 2 weeks, and it keeps you from doing what you need to do, speak to a doctor.

Anger

You may be angry at yourself or family members. You may be angry at the person you’re caring for. Know that anger often comes from fear, panic, or stress. Try to look at what is beneath the anger.

Grief

You may be feeling a loss of what you value most. This may be your loved one’s health. Or it may be the loss of the day-to-day life you had before the cancer was found. Let yourself grieve these losses.

Guilt

Feeling guilty is common, too. You may think you aren’t helping enough. Or you may feel guilty that you are healthy.

Loneliness

You can feel lonely, even with lots of people around you. You may feel that no one understands your problems. You may also be spending less time with others.

You need to learn of ways to take care of yourself. Because if you’re not taking care of yourself, you can’t take care of anyone else.

Further information

Contact the central customer service centre on

[email protected] or 0860 NETCARE (0860 638 2273)

Please note that the centre operates on weekdays between 08:00 and 16:00.